[Artemisia] lighten up...
leishman10 at msn.com
Thu Nov 10 07:08:22 CST 2005
All right now, it is fair to share this kind of thing with the sometimes incontinent and in your case the hard of breathing.
Laughed till...... ok, no details.
Thanks for sharing.
----- Original Message -----
From: Dr. C. M. Helm-Clark<mailto:cat at rocks4brains.com>
To: artemisia at lists.gallowglass.org<mailto:artemisia at lists.gallowglass.org>
Sent: Thursday, November 10, 2005 1:37 AM
Subject: [Artemisia] lighten up...
It doesn't matter what time it is, Maire - I don't have to go to work
tomorrow...(well, technically, later this morning...) ;-)
I have determined that we need to lighten up a bit. I have this
evening actually pulled muscles for real from coughing too much after
somebody's well timed humor on this list. There really is no need to
embarrass and humiliate this individual any further now, but for those
of you who are curious, his initials are Conrad von Z:
"now THIS is the SCA I was HOPING to join"
All I have to left to say is: OW! I now hurt a whole lot and have a
need to take my revenge. Your only protection is to stop reading now.
As the following has only previously circulated among a small but
select number of victims, like Maire, I am now posting it in the Aerie
in order to spread a maximum of damage and will be well gratified
tomorrow morning (well, technically, later this morning) to count the
number of folks who now also share my pulled-muscles... (Most typos
are intentional and please do not cross-post this without asking first
Barbarian Blow-out Slave Auction and Pas d'Armes
Shire of Lunecorne Hafn
February 30, 2004
Cerro Vista, NV
It's time again for Lunecorne Havn'ss annual warlord tourney and
baronial business meeting. The theme this year is the Brightest of the
Dark Ages, so polish up all those Roman Legionaire, Magyar and
Alvaromid personas to parade about. In keeping with our theme, the
format for this year's warlord touney is a barbarian Pas d'Armes. All
fights will be at the barrier warlord-style, where every person or team
who has been eliminated from the lists will accrue to the team of the
person who defeated them. There will be a grand melee at the barrier
between every round, so even those who have washed up will have plenty
of fighting. Each round will use a different Pas d'Armes weapon in the
style of 15th century German "Feats of Arms." Weapons forms will be
great sword, great axe, great spear, punch-maul, single sword and
dagger. Rebatements will be allowed on daggers. If/when we run out of
weapons forms after seven rounds, the above list will be repeated
until a clear victor emerges.
Our feast will be a fabulous assortment of Dark Ages foods, including
Mongolian saddle-tenderized horse meat stew (with carrots and "spud
larva" (tater tots)), almond chicken baked in tomato puree, Viking
salmon cakes with period ranch dressing, and middle-eastern
pineapple-peanut pan thai noodles. The site is free but on the
condition that we do not bring in our own alcohol but use their cash
bar instead. Drinks will be free to anyone who wins more than $100 in
the Casino. When we're done stuffing our faces, there will be dancing
led by Lady Tangltwtapyn de Pseudonominae to the delicate sound of the
dombec. Master Schmertenzug will not be able to come to provide live
music, but he has given Vicountess Tangltwtapyn a tape of dance music
including the ever-popular Hole in the Wall.
The site is not charging us for anything, so long as we use their cash
bar and circulate in garb in the Casino one during Saturday afternoon
and once Saturday evening. Only period-style pavilions are allowed "on
the eric." The site does not allow tent stakes in their wood parquet
floors, so bring an alternative way to set up your tent. Our chirurgeon
wishes to remind everyone that the UV from the fluorescent lights at
the event site are not good for the eyes so please remember to bring
lots of calomine lotion and UV-blocking sunglasses (not allowed inside
helmets). Since the event is being held on the West kingdom side of
the border, West kingdom fire rules will apply and be in force -
portable fire pits are allowed.
The site this year is the convention center at the Gold Pan Casino just
across the state line, complete with 12 foot ceilings in Conference
Room B where we will hold the Pas. This is a site change from what was
advertised last month in the kingdom newsletter. The feast will still
be held on our side of the state line at the St. Jude's parish
parochial school cafeteria in Oleo.
Directions: take your best root to Cerro Vista. Once on Hwy 216, the
Gold Pan will be on your right. Directions to St. Jude's and site maps
can be downloaded from www.rocks4brains.com<http://www.rocks4brains.com/>. Free beta-test version
GPS software can be downloaded from this site so you can watch your
progress driving to the event in real time in your car on your
NMEA-protocol Bluetooth-enabled wireless computer (only the OS2/Warp
version is available at this time). Feastocrat, Rhys ap Owen ap Howell
ap Rhys von Neustadt, 888-555-1212, email barbarianbas AT rocks4brains
DOT com. (c. 4/3/04, by C. M. Helm-Clark)
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