[Artemisia] lighten up...

BECKY LEISHMAN leishman10 at msn.com
Thu Nov 10 07:08:22 CST 2005

All right now, it is fair to share this kind of thing with the sometimes incontinent and in your case the hard of breathing.

Laughed till...... ok, no details. 

Thanks for sharing. 

  ----- Original Message ----- 
  From: Dr. C. M. Helm-Clark<mailto:cat at rocks4brains.com> 
  To: artemisia at lists.gallowglass.org<mailto:artemisia at lists.gallowglass.org> 
  Sent: Thursday, November 10, 2005 1:37 AM
  Subject: [Artemisia] lighten up...

  It doesn't matter what time it is, Maire - I don't have to go to work 
  tomorrow...(well, technically, later this morning...)  ;-)

  I have determined that we need to lighten up a bit.  I have this 
  evening actually pulled muscles for real from coughing too much after 
  somebody's well timed humor on this list.  There really is no need to 
  embarrass and humiliate this individual any further now, but for those 
  of you who are curious, his initials are Conrad von Z:

  "now THIS is the SCA I was HOPING to join"

  All I have to left to say is: OW!  I now hurt a whole lot and have a 
  need to take my revenge.  Your only protection is to stop reading now. 
  As the following has only previously circulated among a small but 
  select number of victims, like Maire, I am now posting it in the Aerie 
  in order to spread a maximum of damage and will be well gratified 
  tomorrow morning (well, technically, later this morning) to count the 
  number of folks who now also share my pulled-muscles...  (Most typos 
  are intentional and please do not cross-post this without asking first 
  - thanks)

  avengingly yours,

  Sage Copy:
  Barbarian Blow-out Slave Auction and Pas d'Armes
  Shire of Lunecorne Hafn
  February 30, 2004
  Cerro Vista, NV

  It's time again for Lunecorne Havn'ss annual warlord tourney and 
  baronial business meeting.  The theme this year is the Brightest of the 
  Dark Ages, so polish up all those Roman Legionaire, Magyar and 
  Alvaromid personas to parade about.  In keeping with our theme, the 
  format for this year's warlord touney is a barbarian Pas d'Armes.  All 
  fights will be at the barrier warlord-style, where every person or team 
  who has been eliminated from the lists will accrue to the team of the 
  person who defeated them.  There will be a grand melee at the barrier 
  between every round, so even those who have washed up will have plenty 
  of fighting.  Each round will use a different Pas d'Armes weapon in the 
  style of 15th century German "Feats of Arms."  Weapons forms will be 
  great sword, great axe, great spear, punch-maul, single sword and 
  dagger.  Rebatements will be allowed on daggers.  If/when we run out of 
  weapons forms after seven  rounds, the above list will be repeated 
  until a clear victor  emerges.

  Our feast will be a fabulous assortment of Dark Ages foods, including 
  Mongolian saddle-tenderized horse meat stew (with carrots and "spud 
  larva" (tater tots)), almond chicken baked in tomato puree, Viking 
  salmon cakes with period ranch dressing, and middle-eastern 
  pineapple-peanut pan thai noodles.  The site is free but on the 
  condition that we do not bring in our own  alcohol but use their cash 
  bar instead.  Drinks will be free to anyone who wins more than $100 in 
  the Casino. When we're done stuffing our faces, there will be dancing 
  led by Lady Tangltwtapyn de Pseudonominae to the delicate sound of the 
  dombec.  Master Schmertenzug will not be able to come to provide live 
  music, but he has given Vicountess Tangltwtapyn a tape of dance music 
  including the ever-popular Hole in the Wall.

  The site is not charging us for anything, so long as we use their cash 
  bar and circulate in garb in the Casino one during Saturday afternoon 
  and once Saturday evening.  Only period-style pavilions are allowed "on 
  the eric."  The site does not allow tent stakes in their wood parquet 
  floors, so bring an alternative way to set up your tent. Our chirurgeon 
  wishes to remind everyone that the UV from the fluorescent lights at 
  the event site are not good for the eyes so please remember to bring 
  lots of calomine lotion and UV-blocking sunglasses (not allowed inside 
  helmets).  Since the event is being held on the West kingdom side of 
  the border, West kingdom fire rules will apply and be in force - 
  portable fire pits are allowed.

  The site this year is the convention center at the Gold Pan Casino just 
  across the state line, complete with 12 foot ceilings in Conference 
  Room B where we will hold the Pas.  This is a site change from what was 
  advertised last month in the kingdom newsletter.  The feast will still 
  be held on our side of the state line at the St. Jude's parish 
  parochial school cafeteria in Oleo.

  Directions: take your best root to Cerro Vista.  Once on Hwy 216, the 
  Gold Pan will be on your right.  Directions to St. Jude's and site maps 
  can be downloaded from www.rocks4brains.com<http://www.rocks4brains.com/>.  Free beta-test version 
  GPS software can be downloaded from this site so you can watch your 
  progress driving to the event in real time in your car on your 
  NMEA-protocol Bluetooth-enabled wireless computer (only the OS2/Warp 
  version is available at this time).  Feastocrat, Rhys ap Owen ap Howell 
  ap Rhys von Neustadt, 888-555-1212, email barbarianbas AT rocks4brains 
  DOT com.  (c. 4/3/04, by C. M. Helm-Clark)
  Artemisia mailing list
  Artemisia at lists.gallowglass.org<mailto:Artemisia at lists.gallowglass.org>

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