[Artemisia] OT: Too much weather TV

Catie Clark cat at rocks4brains.com
Fri Sep 12 22:09:37 CDT 2008


We're sitting here directly in the path of Ike, saturated from too much 
weather coverage on the boob tube, waiting for the power to go out and 
getting extremely punchy. Sean and I started doing weather reporting at 
each other, that's how bad it is... This is what came out:


Weather reporter on the beach somewhere on the Gulf Coast:

This Al Wett reporting to you live here on Gulfside Beach . As you can 
see behind me, even though Hurricane Spike has not made landfall yet, 
there are massive waves pounding the seawall. We have measured wind 
gusts up to 50 mph and I’m here to tell you that hurricanes are windy. 
Aren’t you glad I’m reporting to you straight from the scene of this awe 
inspiring storm because I can now tell you that hurricanes are also wet, 
since it is currently raining. The National Weather Service has warned 
us that it will continue to be windy and wet until the hurricane has 
gone away to flood the Mississippi River Valley for the 16^th time this 
year. And now back to you, John, at bigstorm.com.

Thank you, Al, for that report. I’m sure we’ve all learned something we 
didn’t know before from your on-the-scene coverage of Hurricane Spike. 
Next up, our hurricane expert Dr. Sirrus will explain why hurricane 
surges are not at all related to the Surge in Iraq.

Sometime in the near future, during the next sunspot storm:

This is Al Wett reporting to you live here on the Sun. As you can see 
behind me, the surface of the Sun is very hot and turbulent. In just a 
few moments we will show you some video of a solar flare in its 
formative stages before its solar particles arrive on Earth to fry 
everyone’s radios and cell phones. To give you an idea of just how 
awesome a sunspot storm can be, the solar flare we filmed was over 
100000 miles long. To put that into perspective, that’s the same 
distance as three round trips from Los Angeles and Sydney, Australia. 
Before we run the video, I do want to say that it’s a good thing it’s 
night here, because if it were day, it would be too bright to see…



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