[Artemisia] It's all the King's fault: Part I of the de la Bete peerages

[Dr. Helm-Clark]

 It's all John's faults - yeah, yeah, that's the ticket
isn't that
right Lynn???  

Well, actually, it really is in large part John's fault.  You see,
his Maj has known the de la Aid-and-aBete sisters for many many
years
since they were all "pond scum" one could quite truthfully
say
  He decided that he wanted to "DO" my poor ailing, under-
paid, industrious, hard working apprentice and give her the BUSH. 
This is back in Sept.,  mind you.  Various and sundry folks who
knew that John was contemplating destroying my profitable little
side business of selling off the products of my one-woman
work-horse of an apprentice mentioned how opportune it would be to
do two de la Betes at the same event
not to mention how much fun
 
   
 
So there I was at Crown chatting with his Maj  off to the side
private-like about my making sure my apprentice would be at
Baronial  Birthday in 1000 Eyes since she has this really lousy
real world work schedule that sticks her at work in the middle of
the night on more weekends than not - it is her screwed-up  work
schedule and also her personality and things she's said to me on
occasion that really inclined me to counsel his Majesty when he
asked - the original reason for our little chat - that Osondrea
was someone who was better suited for a sudden-death peerage, sans
vigil.  Well, I knew about the two-for-one plan to potentially do
both sisters' peerages at the same  event, being cursed with both
a bird and a bush for my own sins, so I tend to hear lots of 
stuff along these lines, so I says to his Maj, as we discuss the
problem with Osondrea's  work schedule, "well I can always tell
Osondrea that her sister's getting the bird at Baronial 
Birthday," and an evil plot ways born
  I went and dropped a few
words in Corisonde's ear (I think I just mangled the spelling on
that) about the potential double-whammy of the de le Bete sisters,
and she was bouncing up and down the walkway with glee.  I will
resist the temptation of telling the story of what her oldest son
Chris said just then, except to say that I have a real problem
with torturing teenagers, especially nice and earnest ones like
Chris who I like, particularly when they have a real talent for
perfectly timed malapropisms
  

Anyway, I get home and call Osondrea, and say, "Gee, kiddo, you
better make sure  that you can get that night off from work, cause
I think the Crown will be giving your sis the bird
"  I was ok on
doing this because even if Antoinette's Bird didn't go off at
Baronial Birthday (more on this in a moment), I was confident it
would serve quite nicely to set up  my apprentice and get her to
get the night off and get her to the event.  You see, at this
point I or Viscountess Lynn had already given Antoinette the news
that we wanted to set up  her sister for her laurel by telling
Osondrea that Antoinette would be getting a "court barony  or
peerage or some such, and John wanted us to let Antoinette in on
the plot"  Evil man,  John is
  I like his style
  

Well, now it's about a week and a half later, and I drop by
fighter practice to see if I can  intersect with John at practice,
to make sure everything is a go to do BOTH sisters, because John
being the considerate and proper guy that he is, he needed to
consult with the other  half of the Crown as to her input on all
this and he didn't want to make a commitment right then and there
while the two of us were talking about this during the short
amount of time I had to spend at Crown - so he promised he'd get
back to me
  So here it is at practice and I'm am lucky enough to
run into John in the parking lot!  So we hide behind his vehicle
and he says that both sisters are a go for Baronial Birthday,
Osondrea for her bush, and  Antoinette for her bird.  So John says
to me, conspiratorially, "Go talk to your apprentice and ask her
for me if she'll do her sister's pelican scroll?"  So I go off and
find Osondrea right next to and talking with her sister, and drag
her off, as Antoinette, who I think was  thinking that I was there
to plot with her about her sister's laurel, gives me and Osondrea 
the most interesting (and worrying) look.  

So Osondrea and I put ourselves out of view of everyone and I tell
her that the king wants her to do her sister's pel scroll, and
will she have time.  I'm sure no one has to guess what Osondrea's
answer was.  So then I have to wait for a good moment to drag her
sister off, and I spin Antoinette more "news" on getting Osondrea
her laurel, and John wanted me to touch base with her to make sure
we were on track with luring Osondrea to the event dispite her
work schedule, etc., etc., etc.  I'm pretty good, when I put my
honest and straightforward mind to it, at spinning as good a yarn
as the next con artist
  

So this now leaves us safely at the end October, which turned out
to be a pretty boring  month, all things considered
except for my
calling both sisters occasionally just to "keep  the pump primed
"
 

Just so you all don't think this is completely my doing, it's not.
 Viscountess Lynn was the other major partner in crime
it's just
that Lynn likes to fade into the woodwork, but don't let that fool
you.  The woman is an imp at heart.  Very serious trouble,
Viscountess Lynn.  What an evil and dasterly mind.  I really like
her style
  

Oh yes, I forgot, that before there was the end of October, there
was "The Membership Crisis"  You see, my apprentice and the SCA
registry had a bit of a disagreement about a check
  Long story,
complete with the apprentice being totally miffed at the registry,
all during a period in which several people in Artemisia of my
acquaintence were having problems with the SCA registry
  But this
meant that the apprentice was not a member when the Crown decided
to bush Osondrea.  Actually, when we found out that our kingdom's
membership numbers were down, I called Renee in Milpitas, who I
have known for a long time (there's that story, all too true,
about those bright pink covers on an SCA handbook I had shipped to
the SCA corporate offices which Renee is never going to let me
forget
) and we had a friendly chat about fixing my appretice's
membership problems.  That was a few weeks before I had my chat
with the King about my apprentice getting the BUSH.  So right
after his Maj and me talked, I got all the stuff I needed to fix
Osondrea's membership and mailed it immediately off to Renee.    

Then I got a hold of Mistress Fjorlief in Haga, OL, of An Tir,
because I was hoping she might have an enameled laurel medallion
in stock that would have Osondrea's name on it.  This did occasion
a call to Antoinette at the time to inquire what Osondrea's
favorite color was (I didn't know, amazingly enough, and now I'm
never going to hear the end of it from my former apprentice that I
didn't
I'm cringing already
).  Let me talk about Mistress
Fjorlief for a moment.  This gal I met many years back at a
West-AnTir war.  She's one of those amazing people who makes the
enameled medallions, some of which have transluscent enamels over
textured incised silver backs in period styles that you can see
through the enamels
  yeah, one of those laurels!  (You can see
her stuff at http://www.fineartisanry.com/index.html.)  When
looking at the scanned images she sent me of what she had in
stock, there wasn't anything with the transluscent enamels that
spoke to me, but there was one done in opaque enamels with a
purple background (purple is Osondrea's color, you see) that was
in my house in under two weeks.  It really is beautiful - if you
have a chance, run Osondrea down and take a look at it.  

In case you couldn't tell, I like Mistress Fjorlief's work a lot,
and as someone who makes her living making enamels, many of them
for SCA use, I was happy to give her some business.  As someone
who has done some SCA merchanting myself, I have a lot of respect
for those folks who can make their living doing it - it's a hard
life, just in case you've never seen the inside of an SCA
merchant's life or had a chance to think about it
  

Well, you know, I think I'm going to leave part 2 of this saga
until tomorrow, since this is getting really seriously long and
bed time is creeping up on me, and so you will all have to wait
for the tale of the amazing panic Osondrea caused two and a half
weeks out from THE EVENT - all I will say is thank God for
Osondrea's and Antoinette's cousin Jeanette who saved the day and
the double whammy surprise for us all!  

ttfn 
Therasia, proud laurel of a graduated apprentice and fellow
conspirator with a lot of other peers on this wonderful little plot