Service, was: Re: [Artemisia] Northern Barony

[Angela Perry]

Greetings to all :-)

I have a rather personal, but short, story to share that might lend insight 
into why some people play locally, some on the kingdom level, and some 
hardly at all.

There once was a young woman who discovered the SCA through college friends 
and who loved the Dream, but never really became part of the Reality. On the 
day she decided to quit playing because she felt lonely and not included, 
she met her future husband. Thus, she stayed in the SCA. But a child came 
along, and playing with small children is, as many of you can attest, 
difficult at best. So she attended scant meetings, usually only the “big” 
ones. And then one day she met a king, a great leader who saw through her 
reticence, saw past the lack of letters after her name. The king gave her a 
job, a special job all her own, and she became part of the Reality, not just 
the Dream.

Yes, the young woman was me. The king was His Grace, Duke Reinmar, to whom I 
will be forever grateful for giving me a chance and making me a part of 
something I knew I would love if only I could be included.

Many of you have been playing for many years; in fact, probably most of the 
people on this list (at least, the ones who post, not the lurkers like me) 
have at least an AoA. I look up to you and respect you. But perhaps (and 
please, no offense intended!) you have played so long, had a voice so long, 
that you have forgotten what it is like not to have a voice. It is not fun 
to always be the one in the background, the one who tries to participate but 
doesn’t know how to fit in, how to find that special niche. It is also not 
fun to always take orders from other people.

So my recommendation (from very personal experience) is, if you want people 
to participate, don’t just expect them to contribute. Befriend them, show 
your confidence in them by encouraging them to take on important leadership 
roles, ask them to do something they do particularly well. Find out what the 
new players are interested in and point them to a group where they can find 
common interests and make friends. A group, be it shire or northern region 
or kingdom, with work together if people feel like they belong.

~Lady Verdiana
Ex-Kingdom Minister of Youth

Some excerpts I thought were especially nice :-)

<snip>
3)  Newer people don't always feel like they are given the opportunity or 
encouraged to take positions of "authority" in a group of established 
players.  Some do, but if the newer person
is timid, they may feel like they are intruding on the group.
4)  Unclear expectations.  This is one I am guilty of:  I just assume that 
people know what
to do.  If nobody takes the time to explain things thoroughly to someone who 
is
interested, it can lead to a bad experience for the person just trying it.  
This
can create a situation where they are unwilling to volunteer.
5)  Do you take the time to find a new person to teach how to be an officer, 
or autocrat, or
cook a feast, or do you just do it yourself because it is easier than trying 
to
explain it?  Is that a service or disservice to you and your group?
</snip>

<snip>
Helping newcomers make garb and meet people, or keeping a group of children 
entertained and safe, is just as valid a form of service as heralding a 
court or autocrating an event.
</snip>