[Artemisia] Four Dons walk onto a battlefield...

[Mike Bradley]

Yeah, this story might happen with Knights and squires, but an Artemisian
Don and cadet...never.

Basically, there are two distinct problems with it.
(1) The cadet answered on the first call from his Don.  That is just
completely unbelievable.  No good Artemisian cadet answers a call from their
Don on anything less than the calls of 'cadet', followed by SCA name,
followed by real name.  A really good cadet even ignores all that until the
call of 'hey @$$hole, it's a shame you'll never be a White Scarf because you
can't ever beat *me*'.
(2) The cadet turned around to deliver the 'F U'.  A well trained cadet
should be able to pinpoint their Don's boot with the orange rind by pure
echolocation without ever deigning to look at where their Don is standing.
They will, of course, still deliver the 'F U' for purely aesthetic reasons.

Then again, maybe this just my Don and his cadets...

Don Conchobhar mac Michil
cadet to Don Terrance Petard Cheredame, aka Tarkash
who has yet to subject himself to the horror of taking a cadet (though I do
need someone to make me new garb and fetch me drinks when I'm feeling
lazy...)

On Feb 8, 2008 6:32 PM, John D Gibson <scjdgibson at gmail.com> wrote:

> Amazingly enough I have seen the truth of this story in what was once a
> squire of an Artemisian Duke.  Perhaps you shall hear the real story from
> his grace some Uprising.
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: artemisia-bounces at lists.gallowglass.org
> [mailto:artemisia-bounces at lists.gallowglass.org]On Behalf Of B Wolf
> Sent: Friday, February 08, 2008 3:15 PM
> To: artemisia at lists.gallowglass.org
> Subject: [Artemisia] Four Dons walk onto a battlefield...
>
>
> Adapted from other sources...
>
>
> It's Estrella War, and four Dons are standing by a bridge battle, one from
> Artemisia, one from Caid, one from Atenveldt, and one from the Outlands.
> They're discussing who has the best cadets, and finally, the Outlander
> decides to show how brave and skilled his cadets are.
>
> "Cadet!"
> The cadet arrives, bows, and stands at attention
> "Yes, M'Lord."
>
> "Assault that bridge single handedly, and then bring me a glass of wine
> balanced on one finger!"
>
> "Yes, M'Lord!" The cadet bows, assaults the bridge, taking a couple hands
> and getting a headshot before being defeated, jogs across the camp,
> returns
> with a glass of wine, carefully balanced on one finger.
>
> "Ha, thats nothing," says the Caid Don, "Cadet!"
> The cadet arrives, bows with a flourish, and stands at attention.
> "Yes, M'Lord?"
>
> "Using nothing but a dagger, assault that bridge, then bring me a stein of
> mead balanced on your head!"
>
> "Yes, M'Lord!!" The cadet bows, backs away, assaults the bridge, taking a
> single hand before being defeated, runs across camp, and returns with the
> stein carefully balanced on his cranium.
>
> "Very good, really," says the Atenveldter,"But I'll show you a good cadet.
> Cadet!"
> The cadet arrives, kneels, and remains on his knees.
> "Yes, Master?"
> "Strip to boots, mask, and cup; assault the bridge with only a dagger, and
> bring me a Martini balanced on the tip of your dagger."
>
> "Yes, Master!!!" The cadet backs away on his knees, strips, assaults the
> bridge, managing to kill two while the line is laughing, is
> defeated, sprints across camp, and returns with the martini carefully
> balanced on his tip.
>
> The Artemisian Don nods, smiles, and says, "Impressive, very impressive."
> He turns, and calls to his cadet, who is at the regen point eating some
> oranges, "Cadet, bring me an orange!"
>
> The Cadet turns and replies, "That's a big FU, M'Lord!!!!" dons his mask,
> and returns to the fighting, throwing an orange rind blind over
> his shoulder, and directly into his Don's boot.
>
> The Artemisian Don, smiling smugly, says "Now THAT'S bravery and skill!"
>
> -B
>
> Baron K. Braden von Sobernheim, OL,OP,GA  Baron of Arn Hold
> (Brad Wolf)
> Do not anger a bard, for thy name is silly, and scans to Greensleeves.
>
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